Italy's Gold Rush
From the TimesOnlineAnalysis of waste water in Italy shows a startlingly high level of drug abuseLet the Po panning begin. This is exactly what the Italians need to lay off of all that food! It was bound to happen...Perhaps purposefully to wean them off of all that food that I've gotten to intimately know and love them for.
THE rivers of Italy are flowing with cocaine, say scientists who have adopted a new approach to measuring the extent of drug misuse. The biggest river, the Po, carries the equivalent of about 4kg (8lb 13oz) of the drug a day, with a street value of about £20,000.
Cocaine users among the five million people who live in the Po River basin in northern Italy consume the drug and excrete its metabolic by-product, benzoylecgonine (BE). This goes from sewers into the river. So a team led by Dr Ettore Zuccato, of the Mario Negri Institute for Pharmacological Research in Milan, estimated the use of cocaine by testing the waters of the Po for BE, and for any cocaine that had passed through the body unaltered or reached the sewers in other ways.
I smell the ominous odor of conspiracy.
When I attended Syracuse University, my best friend's mom, Mrs. Argiro, used to wake at 3am with us rolling in with a few too many in us, and restlessly cook us a 5 course meal of whatever she had on hand (the homemade pizza was freaking amazing).
This told me all I needed to know about the Italian's respect for excellent home cooked food. Interestingly enough, it was the conversations we had with that wise woman as we sat there like puppies being teased by a rawhide bone that life's lessons were learned and fond memories were made by her teasing out of us our confessions. We stayed straight because Mrs. Argiro would find out! What would we do for chow at 3am if she was disappointed in us???
This event in Italy could quite possibly destroy the great tradition of feeding drunk college students at 3am!
This is unacceptable so I propose that all those in Italy (exactly zero of you reading this right now) get to the Po River now and do what it takes to clean that river so that the future Mrs. Argiros will be there to help lead and inspire the next generation of dopey boys.
Linked to Wizbang- Carnival of the Trackbacks
change Po to Poo and accuracy will be attained.
Posted by
Dr. Phat Tony |
11:40 AM
Cocaine in the river. Well, that 'splains the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Damn crackheads!
Posted by
Buckaroo Banzai |
1:20 PM
Ya notice how Americans get all the flack for the violence, sex, drugs, rock and roll...
yet it's the german neaderthals making rock dildos and italy's rivers flowing with cocaine...
Talk about double standard!
Posted by
Peakah |
3:06 PM
My grandmother would be rolling over in her grave if she heard about this. She was one of the purest, most beautiful creatures to ever grace both Italy & the US. Miss you, Gran'ma.
I wonder how much bottled Po Diet Coke is going for on the black market?
Posted by
kateykakes |
3:51 PM
These black markets drain productive dollars out of the economies. They drain the productivity out of people. They fund terrorism. Screw the tree hugging eco-fascists protesting GMOs. We do it with insects. We can do it with plants. Sever the drug producing gene, then spread the modified pollen by air drop. The crop then becomes useless. They growers will be compelled to grow coffee and grain.
Posted by
Insolublog |
1:49 PM